We had an incident here yesterday. I had a conference with the younger child’s teacher and we looked at her writing notebook. She had been told to list important things in the front of her notebook, things she could use in her writing. They were divided into categories: People, Life Goals, Places, Activities and so on.
Under people, she listed her Dad and her stepmom, her stepmom’s sister, her next door neighbors, her sister and that’s it. Not me, not my husband, not any member of my side of her life.
When confronted about it, she lied instantly. “That’s you, that’s you and your husband!” but it’s not, of course. She never calls him “Dad” and the fact that the only other people on that list came from her dad’s part of her life reinforces that.
This isn’t the first time this has happened, where she’s “forgotten” us. And it hurts every time. She’s old enough now to know better, she’s old enough now to think about things. I know that she wasn’t thinking because realistically, she wouldn’t think her neighbors are more important than me, but it still hurts and there’s no real way to fix it. I don’t know how to pound into her head that this is incredibly hurtful and terrible and cannot keep happening.
I welcome any thoughts or suggestions on this.