Recovery and Money Issues

It’s been two weeks and change now since the emergency c-section. The baby has seen the doctor twice, for his newborn check at almost 1 week, and for his 2 week checkup. His weight had stabilized before we left the hospital. He was 6 pounds, 9 ounces at birth and 6 pounds, 2 ounces at discharge. 1.5 days later at the pediatrician he was back up to 6 pounds, 3 ounces, and yesterday at his two week checkup he was all the way up to 6 pounds, 15 ounces. He’s catching up as fast as he can, trying to make up for the fact that he was early and small.

He’s incredibly active for a little baby, always lifting and holding his head, rolling onto his side (and starting today, onto his belly, which…I can’t really believe is happening at 2.5 weeks) and when you put him on his belly for tummy time he pushes off and tries to crawl.

I’m not doing nearly as well as he is. I had to do an emergency trip to the doctor last week because my incision had become infected. I still have random pains in the incision and if I move too much I’ll start bleeding heavily. I see the doctor again at the end of the week and I hope that he’ll let me go out and about and drive, since the older children come home tomorrow night. I don’t want them stuck on house arrest with me.

Also, he mostly has a schedule for nighttime, where he sleeps from 10pm-midnight, then again from 1am-4am, and then again from 4:30ish to 7-8am. Thus far I have managed to convince the husband to take the 4am feeding, so I can usually sleep six hours or so, assuming I can get to sleep, which isn’t always the case. The problem we’re having is that he keeps peeing through his diaper and clothes, which wakes him up and makes the resettling process take longer. It’s weird, because the diapers DO fit properly. I’ve started putting him in cloth diapers, which work better, but that’s not a realistic solution because 1) we got a bunch of disposable diapers as gifts that we should really be using and 2) we don’t have enough cloth diapers. We have ten cloth diapers, and the recommended amount for a newborn is a minimum of 24, with 30 being a better choice. And I can’t really afford to buy more diapers, even from alva baby, which is the cheapest place you can get cloth diapers from, at circa 5 bucks a diaper, since we’re talking about probably 75 dollars.

Which brings us to the money situation. We have three major issues to deal with:

  1. the health insurance. Adding the baby to my marketplace plan will add 200/month, not the 100/month that the insurance website said it would cost at the beginning of the year. Alternatively, we can switch to a cheaper plan, which would reduce our monthly out of pocket cost, but not probably enough. The cheapest plan for the two of us that doesn’t come with an insane deductible still adds a hundred a month to the budget and requires us to pay out of pocket on labs and whatnot, which there will be quite a bit of for me and the baby. Whereas, if we stay with my plan, we take the 200/month hit but since I’ve hit my out of pocket maximum for the year, I won’t pay anything else till January. Nothing for meds, nothing for copays, nothing at all. I could do allergy testing and treatment, even, and probably will, because although my allergies are what I’d call “moderate” even moderate allergies are annoying and hard to control and if I can fix it for free, why wouldn’t I do that?
  2. the lawsuit. We filed for an enforcement of the orders in June because my ex keeps willfully misinterpreting the orders and withholding the kids as a blackmail tactic to get what he wants. We signed the contract with my lawyer, but we didn’t have the thousand dollars it’ll cost and so he said we could do payments and once it’s halfway paid, he’ll file the paperwork and we can start the negotiation process. I’ve left that entire process to my husband but I have a sinking suspicion that he hasn’t been paying him and we’re not getting any closer to that getting resolved, so that’s a real issue.
  3. extracurricular activities. The little one has been agitating for gymnastics lessons for two years. I’ve been pushing her off because of the money, but she’s getting old enough that if we don’t start she’ll be aged out of the beginner classes. I found a class that’s near her school and on a day we can do it if we stop the girl scouts, which we have to do anyway since the older one is trying to get onto a sports team this year and the games are that same day. Obviously, I can’t possibly ask for this to come out of the existing budget. I would have to find the money myself. It’s about 700 dollars for the year, for her to do the lessons, which isn’t that bad as far as lessons go. I’ve been trying to do a little work here and there (not easy, as sick as I’ve been these last many months with the preeclampsia) and I have almost 250 in my Paypal account now, which is a good start. I’d feel better if I could have the entire 700 before we start so I don’t have to worry about making the payment each month. But that means that I have to get my hands on an additional 450 dollars before the beginning of September. I’m not sure that I can do that. But neither do I want to deny her this, which is very important to her and after all, this is the only childhood she’s going to have.

Everything is really hard. I’m hoping I can make this all work, but I’m not at all sure how. *sigh*

Oh, but the weight loss continues, although it’s slowed at this point. As of this morning I was down to 205.8. One pound away from a total of 40 pounds lost from my highest weight.


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